Forgotten Title/Unforgotten Subject

I wash my hands of the ashes of my dad,
and pray for my death to be quicker.
The lingering of this disease made an unforgettable killing.
Only, he didn’t know it was unforgettable, did he?
I only hope that now things are better,
And that in heaven he can remember me.

I remember when we played, him and me,
and I remember turning flips in the arms of my dad.
When I was sick and needed dad’s care, his smile always made me better.
And he prayed for my illness to go away quicker
when I told him that I felt like I would never be better.
That’s my dad. I love him unknowing that he
is the prey of this unforgettable disease, killing

him. And the day, I was 15, and I made him cry, killing
his heart because I said that he didn’t love me.
I remember that day. He obviously did, and he
kept me home from that party just the same. My dad
knew what was good for me, and to make the night go by quicker
he took me out on a date. I was Daddy’s little girl and it was all better.

Then came my senior year, things had been better
Break-ups, heart aches, friends killing
themselves. I guess they thought that this would be quicker
than to tough it out. I thought about that option for me
because nothing could ever be as bad as this. Dad
understood things were tough, though he

never down-right said it. Still, my dad, he
helped with losing friends, and said that my life would be better
when I graduated and got my mind off boys, and who said what. Dad
always new just what to say to make my day easier. He knew killing
the terrible memories would make me stronger. He knew me
better than I knew myself. With his help, things went quicker.

Now I’m here, praying for my own death to come quicker
than his. I know dad wouldn’t want me thinking like this. He
always said things happen for a reason. He would want me
to live for a very ripe old age, and have a life better
than he could hope for. I hate this disease for killing
my heart, this horrible thing that took my dad.

Dad, please remember me….
Please God, make it all better, as quickly as possible.
It’s killing me to let go.
He’s the best dad you’ve ever made.

-For Dad and for the day I hope we wake from this nightmare.